Have you had enough of trying to be the mum you think you should be? Every time you try are you getting more and more frustrated, overwhelmed and anxious? Are you wondering how you are ever going to be a successful mother and successful career woman?
Listen up, you can be! I am going to crack open your misconceptions of perfect mum. I am going to show you how to find your authentic version of motherhood and make it work for you.
When a major event happens in our lives our brains go throw through a series of processes and emotions. A flow from process to process is created to enable us to move smoothly through the journey. Occasionally we get ourselves stuck in one of the processes. When this happens we need to ask ourselves why.
Now I count motherhood as a pretty major life event. So you are going to be going through these processes. Let’s take a look at what they are.
There is no denying that you are a mother. But you can deny yourself that you are a good mother. These thoughts don’t come from the truth. They come from your preconception of the ideal version of motherhood. Denying yourself to be your authentic version of motherhood holds you here. You will go round in circles fuelled by mum guilt.
So you have dragged yourself out of denial, still full mum guilt though. You are panicking that you can’t be both mother and woman. You are gripped in fear that you can’t be both an awesome mother to your baby and thrive in your career. You can but you have to be mothering from your unique and authentic version. Don’t get stuck in panic. Take a deep breath and look around at the amazing job you are doing and have done so far. Now step forward because you are heading to the next process.
Those first few weeks of motherhood have passed. Your confidence has grown and you have accepted your new improved version of yourself. You can see what works for you, baby and your family. You are noticing the times when you feel overwhelmed and what caused them. You are ready to trust your maternal instincts. You are ready to find your authenticity in motherhood. And you are sure that you can be both a mummy and successful woman.
Before we look at the final processes I want you to know something. It is at this point you stand out as an entrepreneur or high-flying successful woman. Why? This is where the path splits into two. You can either live in acceptance of this is how it is or; push through those upper limits and grab your authentic version of motherhood. I know you’ve got this because it is what makes you stand out from the crowd. Right, let’s take a look at the final two processes.
This is where you get creative in how you can be your authentic version of motherhood. It is time to take all the information you have gathered. Bring together all your experiences and results as a mum and begin evaluating. What am I talking about? Choosing the elements of motherhood that work for you and leaving the rest on the table. You are finally building the skeleton of your authentic motherhood.
This is the game breaker. You can have done all the hard work and been creative but without action to back it up you haven’t achieved your goals. Before you travel backwards to panic remember taking action is what makes you successful in your chosen career path. Now it is time to implement action into you becoming your unique authentic and successful version of motherhood.
This article is a part of a series by Nixie Foster.
Nixie Foster - The Motherhood Mentor to high–flying female entrepreneurs and career women. The founder of ‘High-Flyer to Authentic Motherhood in 13 Steps’; a mentorship program to assist you in finding your natural identity as a mother and give new mothers the secure, loving bond with their baby which allows them to confidently be their unique version of motherhood.
Check out my website www.nixiefoster.com
All opinions published in this article are the author’s own.